a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
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