last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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