the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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