Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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