it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Randomize
