So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
