Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
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