no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize