Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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