hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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