North Korea, Best Korea!
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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