definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
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