everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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