you guys were way drunker than both of me
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Randomize
