Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
