Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
