I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
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