Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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