Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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