Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
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