Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
