I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
