I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
