I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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