wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
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