How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
