My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
