omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Randomize
