There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
barbara walters just said penis...
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
