FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Randomize
