McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
