well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
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