Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I wear drunk well.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
