I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
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I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
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Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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