Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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