Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
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