Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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