you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
