my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
if i can run in heels then i can drive
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
