This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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