4 words: hood of his car
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
