So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize