Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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