If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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