The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
