8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
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Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
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Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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