Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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