well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
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