Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
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