She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize