i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
