Please, let me fuck your mom
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
we're so committed to being not committed
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize